Do you believe in infertility treatment instead of adoption? |

ohmydrpepper Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

prob so. i feel that there are to many kids out there that need loveing. but then again ppl want their own kids?

smoothopr_2 Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

good point, somehow throwaways are 2nd best , those that do are selfish pigs

christie D Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

if you can adopt god willing you will concieve on you own in due time sometimes just sit and listen to your heart it will tell you what to do

Becca G Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

I think every women who wants a family, always wants a child of her own, it’s a special bond between mother and child. Adoption is very hard to achieve with gay couples, single parents, people who are not married, people who do not make enough money, etc… But if adopting were not so difficult and time consuming then I would say yes, a lotmore people would adopt. I’ve always thought I would have maybe one or two of my own and then adopt atleast one child, but once I looked into, it can take many years to get a baby.

♥ButterFlyAngel♥ Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

Most people want to have their own kids and adoption is usually the last resort in trying to have a family. I would try IVF before trying to adopt.

razi_woman Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

From what I have heard in vitro can cost thousands of dollars in some places. Anyways, I don’t think we should make adoption easier, but I do think it should be free. There of course should still be tons of regulations though, so kids don’t end up in some messed up family. I personally would never to infertility treatments… seems somewhat unnatural to me, but I would never chastise anyone who did. I think a lot of people have the wrong idea about adoption, like you can only adopt older children. Yes, older children need homes for sure, and for some people, like parents who can’t stay home with an infant, this may be a better choice. On the other hand, if you want a newborn, it is possible. I was adopted at 3 days old! Kids don’t come from orphanages anymore, and we aren’t all messed up… some are, some aren’t. Having the same genes as your mother or father is overrated in my opinion, but like I said, on this one, I would leave it up to the individual couple, but people really should consider adoption not as a choice after infertility treatments, but along side it, so you can make the best decision for you.

Natasha J Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

I do agree that if adoption wasn’t so difficult it would definately happen more. And if it didn’t cost so much to adopt, i mean parents spend enough on the child itself. But of course we would still want to insure the safety of the children.

NotAsFertileAsMertyle Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

If I could afford it, I would happily adopt several children.

However; with more and more insurances paying for infertility treatments I believe people would rather go that route. Not to mention the appeal of carrying a child, feeling it grow inside you and going through the experience of childbirth.

Tina Joy! Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

I have my believe in God that He will help me to have a child when He feels it is the right time; it’s difficult for my husband to understand this.

But if I am not able to conceive, then I know that God knew it was best and hopefully I can adopt a child from a 3rd world country seeing that they are the ones who have least of all resources…

V-Man the Tinknocker Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

My wife and I were going to adopt but she started fertility drugs b/c it was going to cost almost as much as our house to adopt unless you were willing to wait up to 10 years for a baby through state agency. Or you could get a child with health or mental problems quicker. Lucky for us we have 2 children now.

redpeach_mi Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

the people who can conceive easily are not the only ones who should have the right to have their own children. obviously all those kids waiting to be adopted came from somewhere and i’m pretty sure it wasn’t the parents desperately trying anything to get pregnant. i am an adopted child which makes my children even more special to me because they are the only blood relatives that i have.

Roc Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

It is natural for someone to want to have a biological child. No one should judge the choices that people make to make this possible.

In fact, many people have biological children and adopt children. It doesn’t have to be either or.

Finally, perhaps so much blame should not be placed on people struggling with fertility who don’t adopt. Not fair at all. What if someone told a poor family that they couldn’t have children because they were too poor? What if someone told a rich family they had to adopt children because they have money? This sort of thinking opens the door to robbing people of the right to make their own decisions. If you’re not paying for the couple’s fertility treatment then it is none of your concern.

Even more so what does it matter. Best of luck to everyone and the INDIVIDUAL choices they make.

friendly face Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

You said it yourself, it’s just so difficult to adopt. The desire to have one’s own child is stronger and that is why so many couples are choosing to try infertitlity treatment first.

mimi_2l Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

Yes some people would prefer to have their own biological child rather than adopt.

Adoption isn’t like being pregnant and giving birth to your own child.

I think it’s the choice of the couple involved, and other people don’t have the right to judge others personal circumstances.

And why are all these people saying it’s selfish to want to have your own child, just like every other woman so just because you can’t concieve naturally your selfish because you won’t adopt ???? :S

Jake D Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

Adopting a child should be made easier. Its a real shame when people go to such great lengths to have their own child when they could simply give an existing child a decent home and a good family to live with. It’s even bordering selfish in some cases.

sleepyincarolina Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

no i would want to try and have my own child before I thought of adopting. There are so many parents out their trying to adopt and they are getting turned down left and right. If the agencies would lift and give some then all those children could be adopted and we wouldn’t have to worry about adoption. If the agencies would start lowering their fees and if they would let ppl that are not way up their financially but still meet alot of other qualifications.. then we wouldn’t have to worry about this issue. I would always want to try to have my own child before i adopt another child. But that is just me… and obviously alot of other women feel this way b/c the infertility treaments are making alot of money b/c of them. ok some have said that it is selfishness b/c most women want to have their own.. how can you see it that way? how is it selfish? we are not the ones who didn’t use protection and just gave our baby up, we are not the ones who drank so much during pregnancy that our children got taken away and put in adoption… I don’t see how ppl can say we are selfish b/c we would rather have our own child. I would most definitely want my own child then someone else’s child. Yes i know that its not the kids fault at all that they are up for adoption… its the parents who are stupid… they don’t want to have a baby b/c they are finishing school.. they don’t want a baby b/c they want to finish traveling the world… they don’t want a baby b/c it would ruin their career.. those are the selfish ppl you need to go and talk too… i love being pregnant and i would never ever not want to go through pregnancy… it is a wonderful experience and no one has a right to say i am being selfish b/c i chose not to adopt…. maybe if we didn’t see so many homeless children that need sponsoring from overseas places…. But when you say i’m being selfish b/c i want a kid of my own genes and dna.. well get over it… i didn’t get pregnant at the wrong time and give up my baby.. i got pregnant at the right time and had my baby and love my baby with all my heart… my heart goes out to those who are stuck in foster care and those who can’t be adopted… but it has nothing to do with me.. there are more ppl who want to adopt then there are kids in adoption… but 80% of them are getting turned down for many reasons that they shouldn’t be…. like i said earlier.. turn to the agencies…

ljb Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

Yes, a lot of children need homes.

But as someone else said, the right or privilege to experience pregnancy and bear your own genetic offspring should not be reserved solely for those who have no trouble conceiving.

I believe adoption should be made simpler — and no, I don’t mean easier in the way that would enable anyone off the street to qualify, so whoever was worried about that consequence can rest assured that no one here would be advocating that! But the process should be simpler, and less costly, yes.

There is nothing stopping a person who is able to have their "own" children from adopting. There is no reason why those who have difficulty conceiving should feel pressure to adopt in the name of "there are so many children who need homes," while people who don’t have difficulty conceiving are essentially let off the hook. In other words: if someone wants to advocate adoption really and truly for altruistic reasons, then they should be willing to put their money where their mouth is, as it were.

I do think more people would be open to adoption if it wasn’t so difficult. One of my closest friends ended up just in the last year pursuing fertility treatments she didn’t think she would….because the entire adoption process was a huge turn off for her. But people have children — biological or adopted — for different reasons. I know a couple who had no fertility issues at all, and after having two bioligical children they adopted two more children. By contrast, I struggled through a lot of fertility treatments and couldn’t bear the thought of adopting children — I’m an adoptee myself, and while every member of my family thought that would or should make me more open to the adoption option, it absolutely makes me less so.

So: yes, I think more people would be willing to adopt if adoption was simpler to achieve.

And: yes, I believe in infertility treatment instead of adoption…if that’s what the couple/individual wants. The choice is not one to be foisted upon anyone. And either choice is valid.

Octopus Rex Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

I BELIEVE IN ABORTION!

CC Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

I think people would choose to use infetility treatments so they can have a child of their own to carry on their genes. I think it’s their porogative to do so, as much as we need children adopted. But, I don’t think we should make adoption easier, well maybe a bit, because these kids not only need a home, but they need a good home. You don’t want to send them to some poor abusive home just to get them adopted and processed.

luisa_mapacha Says:
1. September 2010 at 11:59 pm

Absolutely. It is so expensive and time-consuming to adopt. And single people can pretty much forget about it altogether.

That being said, the system has to be the way it is in order to ensure good permanent homes for adopted children. Look what a mess the foster care system is, and all because things have to be expedited.

As far as having our own children, it’s a selfish yet biological need. We are hard-wired to choose the best mate and produce healthy offspring.